Formula to life - to surrender
- Marta Dobele
- 2 days ago
- 2 min read
What we are trying so hard to avoid or hold in place, may in fact be our dreams,
trying to come into form.
Is there a formula for life?
Is there a list of things we should aspire for?
Are there correct set of values that will set us up for success?
It feels like so much of our pain and dissatisfaction comes from having a vision of how things should be. We follow this self-identifying formula and so often we attach ourselves to a desired outcome.
We struggle with the unpredictably which is, essentially, the way of life.
We live in this irony,
Where we constantly rely on accurate information, calculating kcal, sleep, relying on chat GPT for answers, over the emotional and faulty fellow human beings.
We need to know what the weather is like before we travel somewhere.
We need to know what is his/her zodiac sign to see if we are compatible.
We need to plan our life – from university to marriage, kids, mortgage.
Modern society is obsessed with optimizing time, to be more efficient, to be able to do more! To live longer.
We force ourselves into these molds that promise us certainty.
We walk invisibly cocooned with all the things we wish to control,
We think that by keeping these things close, we will be able to manage them.
By doing so – we end up living in places that we are trying to avoid.
Why some people get cancer while others don’t ?
Why healthy, young women get this disease while relatively unhealthy person lives until 70-80s cancer free?
We have so much information available on what causes cancer, how the cells form, what to eat, how to live to avoid it. Yet, people who follow the formula, some who strictly deny themselves all the ‘fun foods’ and joys – still end up with cancer diagnosis.
It’s fascinating. It's scary.
There is nothing we can control.
Even if we follow the formula 2+2 – it might end up being zero.
Chase happiness highs? Aspire for more things? Live life constantly in the lack or complaining? Thinking that the life of that stranger on Instagram is your dream life...?
I don’t know which is your weak spot, what is that thing that, like annoying mosquito in a dark room, constantly makes you uneasy.
But there will always be something.
Mark Manson expands on this subject in his book The Subtle Art of not giving a fuck:
“Life is essentially an endless series of problems. The solution to one problem is merely the creation of another.”
Perhaps the one and only way to sail through life is to accept that we can’t control anything.
Surrender.
Instead of feeling fear for all that may come bouncing forwards, feel intrigued, delighted even that something new is being born at every second.
And continue sailing. With goals and dreams and aspirations, but with ease.
Trusting that current takes you where you need to be.
Trust that nature knows better than your over-stimulated mind that is constantly being fed formulas on how to live.
Surrender.
Allow your life to unfold.
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